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A GIT – a boomer: an obnoxious, refuse-to-age-gracefully or whatever, case of arrested development.

As a generation we are committed to defying the conventional wisdom that by 50, you are gray, fat and frumpy. We do that by continuing to care about our appearances, keeping fit, getting plastic surgery to repair what sags and bags we could not prevent, listening to rock and roll and wearing jeans -- appropriate to our body type, or, in some cases, not.

That’s us. My husband, Ed, and I may talk about getting older, but he stills plays basketball four times a week (okay, half-court, but it’s still basketball). And me, well let’s not even get started; I’ll go so far as to say, “better living through chemistry” and leave it at that. We are one a constant course of self-improvement; and most of those improvements are external. (And since I live in LA, that’s a big thing). But as grim as the subject of getting older is to most of this generation, there are moments of sheer hilarity. Please join me as I recreate a conversation Ed and I had recently driving home on the 405 with the top down: (Yes, Ed owns a convertible – I’m not kidding, it’s not overkill on making a point)

Me: The porn business is hurting. Too many do-it-yourselfers. No one’s buying the professionally-made stuff anymore. (Never mind what prompted this statement.)

Ed: But you can make fuel out of it.

Me: What?

Ed: Corn; if the corn doesn’t get used, they can make fuel out of it. But I don’t think you can do it yourself.

Me: I said “Porn. Porn is hurting. Not “corn.”

Ed: Oh

And then laughter. But what isn’t funny is WE CAN’T HEAR!!! Too much rock ‘n’ roll? Hmmm, maybe; but probably too many years on the calendar. Does Apple make a hearing aid? The iAid? Steve Jobs, can you hear me?

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